What an awesome day we had with Sir Alex today! He kept on trucking all day even though all he kept saying was "I just wanna sleep"! He finally got his wish after his last therapy session today! He worked so hard today and I am just beaming with pride! He'll say I can't once or twice when he gets tired...and I'll say... "That's not in our vocabulary" .... he will look up at me with those big brown eyes and say "OK".... and then he says..."HOME".... that's right... he is focused on H O M E and that with the Grace of God is going to get him there! More and more of his personality is coming around... he is such a ham and full of cracking jokes... well mouthing things... we have become pretty good lip readers these days! He only signs when we can't understand him. He is a vanilla pudding crack addict.... I'm surprised he doesn't look like it by now, lol. He did get to have some brownies that Miss Shelley made especially for him...bite size and all.... HE LOVED THEM...THANK YOU MISS SHELLEY! Tonight I was cleaning up around his bed....and he taps me on my hand and I turn around and he says... "I'm alive". OUTTA NOWHERE.... "I'm Alive"! What the French Toast?!!! I said, "I know you are and you better thank God because you are not supposed to be here". He said.. "I'm a Miracle" and I said... YES YOU ARE. He said he hates being in the bed and I told him how I begged God that night not to take him from me .... that I would take him paralyzed... I just wanted him alive and I would deal with whatever else he threw at me if I could just have my boy come back to me! Alex looked at me and said..." I would rather be dead than paralyzed". OK .... HERE COMES THE RAINFALL OF TEARS ON MY FACE.... Alex Michael are you kidding me? Don't you ever ever say that again. He said... "it's true". I said..."So is it fair for me to make the same statement?" He said.."No". I said "what if I said something like that to you? You have come soooo far and I am sooo proud of you and how hard you fight everyday.... and you are NOT paralyzed and you WILL walk outta here... it just takes time.".... as tears are POURING down my face! He said..."Mom... stop crying, I am sorry... I didn't mean it"... "you are making me sad".... I said "Alex, don't you ever give up on yourself, don't you ever get down on yourself.... you are my hero and there isn't anything that we can't overcome together.... you are my number one, my BFF... " he said..." What is Brooks?" I said.. " I guess my 2nd BFF"... he said.."What about Nick"? I said.."I guess my 3rd BFF"? .... He said " you can't have that"... there is no such thing... I said .. "well... I guess you are my BFF and they are well... just my kids"... HE GRINNED THE BIGGEST GRIN EVER AND SHOWED ME THAT SWEET LITTLE DIMPLE........ TOO CUTE! He loved that response,and that was all he needed to make him feel better.... lol. It's the little things in life huh?..He Sooo... we had a little heart to heart and I told him that I understand he is frustrated being stuck in the bed as active as he normally is. I DON'T know what he is going thru... but I DO know he is going thru one of the toughest times of his life and that I was going to stand right by him and we would get thru all of it together.. ME, HIM AND J.C......no matter what! I told him that I would not let anything happen to him... nor would I let anyone mistreat him... heck I'm mad I can't get the cleaning lady to just HONESTLY clean my room! Putting a sticker on the toilet that says its clean, running water in the sink and sticking a yellow "floors are wet" sign outside my door...does not justify a clean room, lol! I said... if I am mad at the cleaning lady ...you think I won't get mad at someone if they aren't taking the right care of you??? He agreed and said he was sorry for saying that and that he loved me "times cofinity" something he used to say as a kid instead of "infinity" lol. I can only imagine what runs thru his head as he lays in bed and watches me zip around him with the swiffer or typing on the computer....texting on my iphone...I know he is frustrated. I broke out his cell phone the other day just to see if he wanted to text someone or read his messages... poor thing... he can't really see the small font on his phone.... he can't hold it with both hands.... he just looked at me and waved his hand to put it up. These are the times when I MYSELF have to focus on the postives and not the reasons of why he is in here or devote ANY attention to the person who put him here. I REFUSE! Satan can try and bring us down all he wants but we ain't caving in.... you might as well pack up your bags and go back to those burning pits because we have JESUS in this house ovaaa here! AND THAT MY FRIENDS IS THE REAL DEAL! ALL of my ATTENTION will be and IS 100% focused on Alex Michael! There is no time for foolishness, weakness, drama or negativity in TEAM ALEX! Chad, Brooks and Nick have graciously had to take a backseat.... but we ALL focus on Alex and what HE needs... not what any of US... me included... not any of what we might want or need. I got Alex on track talking about how he IS proud of himself and how far he HAS come since the beginning and how he wasn't supposed to live thru that horrific night! By the end of our conversation... he was smiling so big I could see his dimple which is food for my soul!! THANK YOU GOD for giving me the words to be uplifting when I wanted to get on my knees and cry when he told me he would rather be dead than laying in a bed that he couldn't get out of. YOU GOD... you gave me the strength and the positive words to uplift that broken spirit and make it whole again... so THANK YOU! He has been renewed... he knows it is going to be tough... he knows he will have to fight off the pain.... H O M E is where he wants to go and that is exactly what he is focusing on! HE WILL BE WALKING SOON.... YOU ALL KNOW IT TOO! Pray for my little guy..... pray for peace of mind... pray for strength.... pray for swelling to continue to go down so that we can schedule that cranioplasty.... just pray for Alex in general.... he is not one to sit still long and I know that inside this is killing him and I just want him to be at ease with his progress because he is making LEAPS AND BOUNDS progress! He is taking steps, playing putt putt, pulling himself up and standing with little help...AMEN!! .........DAY 47..... THANK YOU GOD FOR ONE MORE DAY WITH MY HANDSOME BOY!
To lighten the mood a little since I threw all that at ya'll.... here is a happy funny ending to our night before I close...... He is in bed....scratching his head or rather... rubbing his head where the scar and stitches still are and he calls me over to the bed to scratch for him. Scratching is really rubbing... no fingernails involved.. he feels better about me doing it so he doesn't mess anything up. I don't need a whole other situation to arise out of nowhere...if you know what I mean! So I go over there and he tells me .... you ready for this... " I think I have Lice".... hahahahahahaha... I was like..."WHAT?.... Alex... you haven't been in contact with anyone for you to get Lice". "We are in a hospital"..... He said..."YES I HAVE!". What he doesn't understand is that his scalp is healing and the scabs are drying up and it's itchy.... he automatically assumes he has bugs in his hair...hahahahahaha!!! I LOVE IT... YOU CRAZY KID!! Sooooo to ease his mind... I said I would go get his nurse and let Miranda check him which made him feel MUCH better. So I go out to the nurses station and get Miss Miranda and another nurse to come in... told her to act all professional (not that she isn't) but to really put on a show and make him believe he doesn't have Lice. She gets out the flashlight... we turn on the light and she looks at his scalp and she tells him that his scalp is just healing and that he doesn't have lice... he turns to her and says..." Yes I Dooooooo"! HAHAHAHAHA... Both nurses finally convince him he DOES NOT so that he can get some sleep and we pinky promised Miss Miranda that he would get in the shower tomorrow night and wash that scalp. He HATES the shower because he gets too cold... it's hard to hold his head steady and sit up and get washed.... too much to concentrate on doing all at one time for him right now....BRAIN OVERLOAD....and PHYSICAL OVERLOAD lol. But he pinky promised sooooo.... it's a done deal now! Scalp washing it is because you insisted you have Lice..... hahahahaha... love it!
He is becoming very affectionate wanting me to lay in bed with him...... taking his right arm and hugging me half way... puckering up for kisses.... not just one but 3 in a row.....THANK YOU GOD! It's the little things..... and you know what's funny.... here I am running around here cleaning.... he is laying in bed and wants me to stop what I am doing at the drop of a hat and lay in bed with him.... for a split second my automatic response was "one minute".... NO LISA....STOP....DROP....AND GET IN THAT BED WITH THAT PRECIOUS BABY BOY! See.... it's soooo easy to get back into that routine of where I put him on hold because I am in the middle of something.... NO! And all of you listen to me good.... STOP... DROP... and DO whatever it is that those young ones want you to do! I realized tonight I hadn't pulled my bible out in days.... WRONG....get in it...stay in it.... THAT'S WHERE IT'S AT! It's easy to get caught up in routines people.... that's the devil knocking... don't let him in! He wants you to forget about the things that are important in your life...... STOP, DROP and DO! Don't sweat the small stuff....LOVE ONE ANOTHER.... enjoy family and friends....let petty stuff go! Alex Michael Ross is ALIVE and that my friends is truly A MIRACLE OF GOD and I hope you all learn from this.... LIFE CAN CHANGE IN A SECOND and I am only ONE of many many many in the news to be lucky enough to tell you about it!
PEACE~LOVE~N~THUMBS UP!!!
Lisa
PS.... My extended list of Thank You's for this weekends festivities and there may be more:
Jacksonville Jaguars, Diane Monahan , Sally Leonard, Brandy Tate, Charles Cannon, Barbara Batt , All Wicked Out/Darlene Strickland, Dee Bomhardt w/Gate Fleet Services, R & J Towing , Joshua Askew/ JMA Investigative Services,Mary and Mike Cowger and Southern Wrecker. THANK YOU GUYS FOR MAKING THIS WEEKEND POSSIBLE!!! xoxoxo
